


Love and war

by MachiMaquiaveli



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Clint yips, Confused Steve Rogers, Embarrassment, Gossip, Phil Coulson is a sweetheart, Phil Coulson is such a fanboy, SHIELD, SHIELD Family, Silly, crack-fic, fanfics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-05 23:42:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16377290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MachiMaquiaveli/pseuds/MachiMaquiaveli
Summary: Steve is startled when he discovers some SHIELD Agents have a secret hobby that involves him.





	Love and war

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [At Your Service](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14624802) by [elle1991](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elle1991/pseuds/elle1991). 



> Just something that came to my mind after talking to my friend [elle ](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elle1991/pseuds/elle1991) about one of her fics, she really has some awsome works so you should give them a chance.
> 
> Italics are for thoughts  
> Comments and kudos are always welcome.  
> Also you can find me on [tumblr ](https://machimaquiaveli.tumblr.com/)  
> \------------------------------------------------------------

Whispers follow Steve anywhere he goes. It was normal; he was Captain America, it was normal for people to talk. But lately the whispers followed him to the most unsuspected places, like SHIELD HQ. Usually the agents were respectful and quiet, they never speak unless they were 100% sure he couldn’t hear them but lately they were just getting louder and louder. And Steve wasn’t even sure what to do or what to think, half part of the time he wasn’t even sure they were talking about him but then the longing looks were kind of weird.

‘Did you read about the trial? Poor Steve’ says one agent

‘OMG! That was so angst that I cry.’ Answered another one

‘Please, be quiet,’ says a third ‘I’m still recovering from the Peggy issue.’

They all stare at Steve for a moment before running away with pink ears. **  
**

**And then in the cafeteria…**

‘Are you seriously re-reading it again?’

‘Yeah; but only the hot parts with the Howling commandos actually howling.’

‘Gosh, that is so hot, like asdjdsjdjd.’

‘I’m not sure what is hotter; stucky or Happyjac.’

‘Please, it’s stucky and then HappyDum.’

‘No way.’

‘Yes way.’

The two agents suddenly realize that Steve is looking at them puzzle for the mention of the Howling commandos and quickly change their subject to the weather.

Even Clint is acting really weird, which is something he usually wouldn’t say about his friends but he just catched him hiding a blue folder under his t-shirt. Steve cocks his head while Clint sticks to the wall and slowly retreats with an embarrassed look.

‘Can anybody explain me what is going on!?’ Steve finally snaps making Clint run for his life, still, too slow for a super soldier; Steve grabs him by the neck and Clint yips.

‘Clint.’ Steve makes sure to put his trademark disappointed look.

Clint yips again putting his best puppy eyes to work. Yet Steve is too frustrated to fall for that.

‘The folder’ He orders

Clint gives up almost immediately and presents him the folder.

‘Think twice before opening.’ Are Clint last words before he disappears.

Unfortunately Steve doesn’t listen and he opens it without hesitation. The first page is a very detailed, and very filthy, narration of a sex encounter between him and Bucky before the last has to leave his home to go to the military training camp. Steve throws the folder away like it was on fire.

‘What the hell?!’ He screams

 

* * *

  

The next days the whispers burn in his hears while he walks the building searching for Clint. It seems like earth has just swallowed him, but Steve knows that he is just avoiding him. Too bad he cannot avoid him forever and soon enough he pulls Clint out of the vents from the infirmary.

‘I want answers and I want them now.’ Steve hisses

Clint curls himself in Steve’s grip.

‘Ok. I confess. I killed JFK.’ He screams

Steve jerks him.

‘Area 51 is real. I’ve been there.’

Steve jerks him again.

‘I’m the one who always eat the last candy bar on the box and never buys more.’

‘I knew it!’

‘Can I leave now?’ Clint struggles against Cap’s grip pointlessly

‘Sure… wait! No. I wasn’t asking about that. I’m asking about the folder.’

Clint stops fighting and sighs.

‘Did you open it?’ He asks

‘I wish I didn’t.’

‘Told you.’

‘What the hell was that?’

Clint sighs again.

‘There is a huge part of your story you keep secret from everybody; so people just made up whatever comes to their minds.’

Ok. That makes sense, in his times there was also a gossip mill. But one thing is the gossip mill and other thing is… this.

‘Who gave you the folder?’ Steve finally asks

‘I bought it from Maria Hill, she sell them a quarter the chapter.’

Steve wants to scream

‘There are more?’

‘So far there are 52 chapters but people think the end is coming soon. We are not sure tough.’

Steve is so shock that his grip loses and Clint uses it to run. By the time Steve goes back to his senses the archer is on an undercover mission in Calayan, Philippines.

 

* * *

  

The last person Maria Hill expects on his office asking for THE folder is Steve Rogers aka Captain America; and yet there he is, with $13 in his hands and an undecipherable look.

‘You sure?’ She asks

‘Yes, and when I’m done you are going to tell me who writes it.’

‘I don’t know who writes it; the chapters just appear on my office at different times, always hidden in a blue folder.’

‘Well, I’m going to find out and tell them a couple things.’

‘Don’t you dare!’ Maria can’t believe she is talking like that to Captain America but the stakes are too high.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Last time anybody tried to find out who the author is we suffered a hiatus of six months. Six months, ok? People were furious. I’m not going to risk another hiatus again.’

'Fine; I will do it myself.’

‘If we have to suffer another hiatus I will tell everybody it is your fault. And you will be burn at the stake.’

Steve had no idea what a hiatus was but coming from her sounded dreadful, and he knew she didn’t threat in vain. So he had to make sure nobody knew he was watching. Too bad other things got in the way of his plans.

 

* * *

 

Steve sat on the bed ready for an awfully disgusting bunch of lies but what he found was a touching tale of what life could have been if he and Bucky were gay and he hadn’t lost Bucky on the train. He would never admit it but he even cried a couple of times. And then it came to an abrupt end.

‘Where is the rest?’ Yelled Steve in Maria’s office

Maria Hill couldn’t hide her surprise, It was this the same that two days ago wanted to risk a six months hiatus only to give the author a piece of his mind?

‘Hello to you Steve, yes I’m fine thank you for asking.’ She deadpan him

‘Where is the rest?’ He asked again

‘I’ve told you, I’m not the author; the folders just appear in my desk and I sell them.’

‘And now I have to wait? That’s it?’

‘Yeah, unless you piss off the author and we go on hiatus again.’

‘What is hiatus?’ Steve had to know what it was at stake

‘It means that the author stops writing nobody knows for how long.’

The blood disappears from Steve face.

‘No more chapters? So we will never know how the story ends? What? How?’

Steve tries to organize his thoughts; he must know who writes this thing. It’s not right to just write stories about people; on the other hand, he desperately needs to know how the story ends. Like, now that he had started to read he cannot stop, and the idea of being left without a proper ending its plain wrong.

‘By your expression I’m going to assume you don’t want to risk the hiatus.’ Says Maria stopping his inner debate. Steve sighs.

‘I guess not, at least not until I have the last chapter.’

‘Ok.’

Maria smiles, another one who bites the dust.

‘Do you know when…?’ Steve asks shyly

‘For the last time, no; although usually is one week, two top.’

Steve nods; one week is not too much; he could do one week. He meets Phil on his way out and greets the Agent. When he is gone Phil looks to Maria.

‘Since when you and Steve are seeing each other?’ He asks with a mock

‘Since he has become obsessed with certain story of love and war.’ She informs him

‘That shit? God, I’ve never though he was one of those.’

‘I though you loved anything related to Captain America memorabilia.’

‘For your information I’m only interested in official-canon-compiling-merch, a rough draft written by who-knows-whom is not of my interest.’

‘Whatever grumpy.’

Phil leaves with a frown and walks back to his office with his best poker face but once he is inside, door lock and cameras off he starts to jump like a little kid high on sugar.

_‘He likes it’_ He cheers _‘He likes my story!’_

The rush keeps going while he works in the last pages, he had planned to wait until the weekend so he could write in peace but now that he knows that Cap, (gosh Cap) himself was waiting for it he can’t help himself. The last two chapters are done and delivered through the vents to Maria in thirteen hours.

 

* * *

  

A tiny tear falls when Phil sees Steve hugging the pages in blissful happiness, immediately sitting on a corner to read. If the Agent had to guess, he would say that Steve is happy for the chapters but he is even happier because he must believe that now that it is over, people will leave the subject. Phil pities the poor soul who will have to explain him the truth and tell him about the other eight texts that came before this one.

And the new that is already in the way.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like it, Comments and kudos are more than welcome. Let me know your thoughts :)
> 
> Also you can find me on [tumblr ](https://machimaquiaveli.tumblr.com/)  
> Have a nice day :^*


End file.
